That's Just How It Was
by germanbrothers
Summary: While in East Germany, Gilbert buys a television for the first time - and gets more than he bargained for. (Short one-shot, light Germancest)


_A/N: So this mini drabble came about with a discussion with a friend about the prevalence of Western German TV in East Germany. Basically, with the right equipment, 80-90% of East Germans had access to Western TV networks on their televisions and many of course chose to watch that instead of Eastern programmes. The only real exceptions was the Dresden area and a few other remote spots - you can see a map of it on Google if you search "West TV in East Germany". As you can imagine, this had a huge impact on the fate of the Party, the attitudes of consumerism in East Germany, and the education of East Germans about Western society & culture._

_While it was not illegal to watch Western programmes from your television, it was illegal to invite others over to watch, as it was seen as "spreading antistate propaganda"._

* * *

Gilbert had just gotten a television. This was a huge accomplishment for him, after months of saving and "getting by" (though there really wasn't much of a difference nowadays between "getting by" and "not getting by"), so of course he wanted to celebrate the best way he could.

His brothers-in-occupation, the other East German states (well, they weren't exactly 'states' anymore, but they did their best), as well was Hungary, all agreed to help him set up and celebrate the arrival of their new family member, Gilbert's television.

"I brought an antenna," Saxony said with a grin upon arrival with the others.

"I already have an antenna," Gilbert said simply with a frown. "It's already set up, so I don't need-"

"No. This is a special antenna." The blonde winked. "I'll be right back." He had only just put his bag down before zooming off to set up his 'special antenna'.

Gilbert forgot about him momentarily as Elizaveta arrived, with beer as promised. Not long after, the small gathering of struggling former states was in full swing. Not much could be done in ways of fanfare, however Gilbert always enjoyed his apartment filled with the sounds of life and laughter. This was less about the television, really (not like he had time to watch it nowadays), and more about having good company for a little bit of time.

Saxony announced that he got his antenna set up and Gilbert didn't pay it much mind at all. It seemed that the state was only interested in attending so he could watch television —

Gilbert stopped at once and almost dropped his beer when he heard, through the background noises of his brothers' voice, the voice of his closest brother.

A voice he had not heard in a very long time.

The room was suddenly silent and everyone's attention turned the source of the voice - the television. Gilbert turned on his heel, his eyes fixed on the piece of technology.

On television, his television of all things, was his brother. It was some programme about the global economy or whatnot, with his dear younger brother, Ludwig, speaking to a reporter.

Immediately Gilbert was next to Saxony on the couch, staring at the screen. "What is this?" he whispered.

"Western TV," Saxony said with a grin. "I told you I had an antenna. I don't get it in Dresden, so when you said you got-"

"Shhh," Gilbert put his hand over the man's mouth, not breaking eye contact with his brother. Ludwig was staring right at the camera as he spoke. It was like he was looking right through the camera at Gilbert's face. It gave him shivers.

"Wow," Elizaveta said quietly, coming up behind him. "He looks so…strong, and healthy, and…"

"Great," Gilbert muttered softly. "He looks…he looks great." _Of course he looked great_, Gilbert thought bitterly. _This was what happened when you leave your brother for good, tell him you don't need him. Of course he looks magnificent. Why would he look anything less?_

"Lonely too," Brandenburg said quietly. Gilbert looked back at him with a skeptical eye, but the man shrugged. "Look at his eyes. They just look quite…well, sad."

Gilbert rolled his eyes. "Please. If you're trying to insinuate that he misses me, you're wrong. Look at how prosperous he is. I bet he hasn't thought of me in years."

Saxony slowly raised the volume. "Talking funny, too. I think that's some kind of Bavarian dialect! I've never heard him speak like that."

Gilbert snorted and leaned back on the couch, crossing his arms over his chest. "You kidding? He used to talk like that all the time. It sounds so dumb out of his mouth, so of course he'd only do it when he wanted to piss me off and to get…my…attention…"

His voice faded off when the realization hit him and he slowly fixated back on the television.

No. It wasn't true. Ludwig hated him, was better off without him. And Gilbert hated Ludwig, didn't need him, didn't miss him. That's just how it was.

"If…if only he wasn't so far away. I'd punch him," Gilbert mumbled, clenching a fist.

Elizaveta smiled and put her hand on his shoulder and gave it a comforting squeeze. "But he isn't," she said. "He's closer than you think. He always has been."

Ludwig still spoke, a bit fuzzy on the set, all the way in the Western world in that stupid Bavarian dialect; and yet, in that brief time, Gilbert's brother was there, with him, in his living room, looking right at him, talking to him.

_I miss you,_ he felt Ludwig's words through the programme. _I still love you. _

Gilbert closed his eyes and bowed his head, gulping harshly. For the first time in a long time, he admitted it to himself.

_I miss you too._


End file.
